at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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