I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
