You're a womanizer and a bitch.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
