why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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