You smell like stripper and shame
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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