My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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