You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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