I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
