you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
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his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
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that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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