Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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