I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
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