Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
