i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
