i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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