I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Swine flu. Run for my life!
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
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She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
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The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick