Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.

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  (248): The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out. http://tfl.nu/flyw
  Replies (2) Good night (617) Bad night (1220)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  "Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.

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  (419): "Morning after" poops are always like, interesting. http://tfl.nu/5eje
  Replies (12) Good night (971) Bad night (2257)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?

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  (503): do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice? http://tfl.nu/c0bh
  Replies (14) Good night (608) Bad night (4975)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up

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  (301): The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up http://tfl.nu/7low
  Replies (29) Good night (2984) Bad night (794)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar

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  (513): you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar http://tfl.nu/7jk8
  Replies (21) Good night (6234) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.

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  (845): i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now. http://tfl.nu/ygdu
  Replies (12) Good night (998) Bad night (3327)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.

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  (813): If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing. http://tfl.nu/gg1f
  Replies (26) Good night (6102) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'

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  (306): I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes' http://tfl.nu/oxkp
  Replies (9) Good night (7775) Bad night (1018)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here

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  (917): Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here http://tfl.nu/lif5
  Replies (3) Good night (3053) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?

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  (902): Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions? http://tfl.nu/r2b3
  Replies (6) Good night (1995) Bad night (1384)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.

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  (208): Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon. http://tfl.nu/yvgl
  Replies (6) Good night (1581) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.

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  (765): So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor. http://tfl.nu/2e0y
  Replies (6) Good night (1430) Bad night (468)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard

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  (610): I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard http://tfl.nu/mt5d
  Replies (3) Good night (1243) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.

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  (757): Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant. http://tfl.nu/nvyb
  Replies (8) Good night (470) Bad night (926)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"

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  (719): What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family" http://tfl.nu/mzlk
  Replies (1) Good night (349) Bad night (205)

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