Texts From Last Night

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  (817): View more from Texas

  what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?

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  (817): what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!? http://tfl.nu/lfzq
  Replies (9) Good night (4096) Bad night (758)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.

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  (912): Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy. http://tfl.nu/2f82
  Replies (42) Good night (796) Bad night (5542)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?

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  (508): There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun? http://tfl.nu/av48
  Replies (17) Good night (4855) Bad night (1208)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation

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  (970): she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation http://tfl.nu/xd2t
  Replies (23) Good night (6085) Bad night (1110)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.

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  (678): I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night. http://tfl.nu/yws8
  Replies (9) Good night (8623) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?

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  (864): I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me? http://tfl.nu/6foj
  Replies (4) Good night (4534) Bad night (1001)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.

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  (412): My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me. http://tfl.nu/dzz5
  Replies (40) Good night (922) Bad night (7698)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.

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  (386): well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake. http://tfl.nu/2ev4
  Replies (8) Good night (2904) Bad night (812)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.

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  (417): In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D. http://tfl.nu/wwrb
  Replies (9) Good night (2812) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now

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  (205): They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now http://tfl.nu/ocyi
  Replies (10) Good night (1946) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.

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  (512): Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America. http://tfl.nu/xibs
  Replies (1) Good night (1908) Bad night (453)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.

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  (479): I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me. http://tfl.nu/04w2
  Replies (9) Good night (608) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.

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  (212): We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere. http://tfl.nu/afoi
  Replies (9) Good night (1791) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement

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  (787): I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement http://tfl.nu/yxd8
  Replies (3) Good night (397) Bad night (727)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it

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  (703): She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it http://tfl.nu/i9kz
  Replies (2) Good night (295) Bad night (324)

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