Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
