a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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