How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize