You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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