the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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