remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
