it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
