Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
