I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize