I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
