I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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