girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
