I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
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