When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
