we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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