we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
