So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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