Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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