Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Randomize
