I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
