There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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