Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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