Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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