if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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