just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I have fence marks all over my body
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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