i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
