I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
