sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You've changed since you got that strap on
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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