so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize