We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize