Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.