Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Even my vagina gasped.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
