Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Oh god it's open bar.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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