Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
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