your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
What drink are we having for lunch?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
