It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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