All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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